He's been prone to frustration and despair - whether because of his father's rebuke, horror at the weight of his past crimes, inability to control his bloodlust in the Donut shop, his inability to save Connor, and the loophole in his curse that denies him true intimacy and love.
If this is true, then it comes and goes. Because I think he had hope after he met Buffy (before losing his soul again in s. 2) and then he had hope again after the Shanshu prophecy (until he realized he could never make up for his past crimes), and then he had hope again when he was first raising his baby son (until that son disappeared and came back as his greatest accuser).
My pet hope, is that we're leading to a storyline examing the "Liam" in him, and how the real source of both his good as Angel and his acts as Angelus is rooted in traits of his own humanity - ultimately leading to our hero coming to a better integration and understanding of himself.
I'd gotten the sense through flashbacks and insights in "Spin the Bottle" that Liam wasn't just some simple proto-fratboy. Rather that frustrated ambitions, hopelessness about his own life, and general despair led him to the life of debauchery and drunkeness he'd engaged in before Darla killed him. And that those metaphorical "inner demons", coupled with the lack of soul and demonic drives, ultimately are what fueled Angelus' rampages.
I have my own analysis how young Liam (STB) informed older Liam (Becoming/The Prodigal) informed Angelus on my site.
The question of Angel's integration is interesting, because most of the time he doesn't disown Angelus verbally, he calls his unsouled time "me" and "I". He acknowledges that it was him, just unsouled. And he owns his actions as Angelus. When he was "fighting for redemption" he was fighting to make up for his unsouled actions. Now that he thinks he's going to hell, he believes it is because of his (mostly) unsouled actions. That's owning one's own behavoir.
But there is another part of him that wants to see his souled self as a better person, as capable of doing good (indeed, over-committed to doing good). So I'm wondering part of his guilt this season stems from being so tied to the label of "Champion" last season that he neglected those times he could have helped Connor as a father.
And dare I hope...Shanshu? (Whatever that may actually be.)
Who knows if this prophecy even applies to Angel. But by the number of people predicting it's really about Spike is almost cliche and predictable now. It'd be interesting if it does turn out to be about Angel after all.
What he needs, is to find the motivation within to drag himself out of the gutter again, and to resolve what it is about him in that he would keep bringing himself into those gutters in the first place.
In a word, too much guilt. And the need to overcompensate for it with either manic dives into his "champion" persona or "I'm trash doomed to hell" despair. He lets his slip-ups like the one in the donut shop or the one in the 50's Hyperion hotel drive him into despair. He lets his inability to make up for all his past wrongs drive him into noir-depair. He lets his failures with baby Connor and teen Connor drive him into despair. He seems to believe in a false dichotomy whereby he's either an angel or a monster. He can't let every mistake get to him. He's only human, if you know what I mean.
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timeasmymeasure
He's no angel. No devil, either
If this is true, then it comes and goes. Because I think he had hope after he met Buffy (before losing his soul again in s. 2) and then he had hope again after the Shanshu prophecy (until he realized he could never make up for his past crimes), and then he had hope again when he was first raising his baby son (until that son disappeared and came back as his greatest accuser).
My pet hope, is that we're leading to a storyline examing the "Liam" in him, and how the real source of both his good as Angel and his acts as Angelus is rooted in traits of his own humanity - ultimately leading to our hero coming to a better integration and understanding of himself.
I'd gotten the sense through flashbacks and insights in "Spin the Bottle" that Liam wasn't just some simple proto-fratboy. Rather that frustrated ambitions, hopelessness about his own life, and general despair led him to the life of debauchery and drunkeness he'd engaged in before Darla killed him. And that those metaphorical "inner demons", coupled with the lack of soul and demonic drives, ultimately are what fueled Angelus' rampages.
I have my own analysis how young Liam (STB) informed older Liam (Becoming/The Prodigal) informed Angelus on my site.
The question of Angel's integration is interesting, because most of the time he doesn't disown Angelus verbally, he calls his unsouled time "me" and "I". He acknowledges that it was him, just unsouled. And he owns his actions as Angelus. When he was "fighting for redemption" he was fighting to make up for his unsouled actions. Now that he thinks he's going to hell, he believes it is because of his (mostly) unsouled actions. That's owning one's own behavoir.
But there is another part of him that wants to see his souled self as a better person, as capable of doing good (indeed, over-committed to doing good). So I'm wondering part of his guilt this season stems from being so tied to the label of "Champion" last season that he neglected those times he could have helped Connor as a father.
And dare I hope...Shanshu? (Whatever that may actually be.)
Who knows if this prophecy even applies to Angel. But by the number of people predicting it's really about Spike is almost cliche and predictable now. It'd be interesting if it does turn out to be about Angel after all.
What he needs, is to find the motivation within to drag himself out of the gutter again, and to resolve what it is about him in that he would keep bringing himself into those gutters in the first place.
In a word, too much guilt. And the need to overcompensate for it with either manic dives into his "champion" persona or "I'm trash doomed to hell" despair. He lets his slip-ups like the one in the donut shop or the one in the 50's Hyperion hotel drive him into despair. He lets his inability to make up for all his past wrongs drive him into noir-depair. He lets his failures with baby Connor and teen Connor drive him into despair. He seems to believe in a false dichotomy whereby he's either an angel or a monster. He can't let every mistake get to him. He's only human, if you know what I mean.