Spike fen will probably villify and defriend you in droves, but you have my utmost respect. I cannot understand in any small measure how any woman with self respect could be a Spuffy shipper after Seeing Red. And the blaming the victim defense that they most often spout makes me want to force therapy on a lot of them. Unfortunately, Joss created a character who can literally get away with murder, and instead of working to fix that, he caved in to fan pressure and a love of the pretty. I gave up believing in Joss' vision a long while ago, but this isn't something I can ever really forgive him for.
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