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dlgood.livejournal.com
Thursday, December 13th, 2007 05:05 (UTC)
Hail friend, and servant of the court. Indeed, it is I, the Tick!, crusader for justice and fellow defender of our fair The City.
Your honor, the defendant stands accused of serially assualting department store Santas.
Assaulting how?
The defendent is going to plead guilty to misdemeanor disturbing the peace...
Aha! But peace was already disturbed. At least, the piece of mind that comes with a visit with Jolly old Saint Nick!
Santa wouldn't let Big Blue over there sit on his lap, so he zapped him with cattle prod.
How's Santa.
Mostly okay, with some complaint pertaining to some delicate issues, but expecting a full recovery.
The defendant temporarily shorted out his north pole.
Aha! But I merely brought the charge of justice to bear upon our imposter. Jolly Saint Nick would spare some lap space for the Tick!
Speaking of lap space, is that maid friend of yours around?
Back on topic, you recognize that you can't zap every department store Santa right?
No, not every Santa.
And that sitting on Santa's lap is really for children.
Children of all ages?
No, mostly children of children's ages.
What about large children. I could be a five year old with a glandular disorder.
Your honor, he could be...
Well, then. Fifty dollars and time served. Next!
It was a shock to the system.
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timeasmymeasure
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Your honor, the defendant stands accused of serially assualting department store Santas.
Assaulting how?
The defendent is going to plead guilty to misdemeanor disturbing the peace...
Aha! But peace was already disturbed. At least, the piece of mind that comes with a visit with Jolly old Saint Nick!
Santa wouldn't let Big Blue over there sit on his lap, so he zapped him with cattle prod.
How's Santa.
Mostly okay, with some complaint pertaining to some delicate issues, but expecting a full recovery.
The defendant temporarily shorted out his north pole.
Aha! But I merely brought the charge of justice to bear upon our imposter. Jolly Saint Nick would spare some lap space for the Tick!
Speaking of lap space, is that maid friend of yours around?
Back on topic, you recognize that you can't zap every department store Santa right?
No, not every Santa.
And that sitting on Santa's lap is really for children.
Children of all ages?
No, mostly children of children's ages.
What about large children. I could be a five year old with a glandular disorder.
Your honor, he could be...
Well, then. Fifty dollars and time served. Next!
It was a shock to the system.